Time to Wake Up

Oh these summer days. Unfortunately we’ve been sleeping most of them away. Movie marathons, reading, writing and late night snacks. Without having to wake up for anything we literally could sleep the day away. It’s okay for a bit but I’m finding how much we are missing. We have been challenged with routine for many years. I only could dream, try but barely achieve. So many obstacles that came our way. In a daze, in a fret, just hardly getting there. This ruthless pattern has haunted me since childhood. I have worked hard so this wouldn’t carry on to my kids. But life obstacles sure would get in the way. A step forward; a step backward. Oh when will I break free. It’s time to change from barely getting by. It’s time to get there on time. I don’t know how to exactly change this overnight. All I know it’s time to wake up! 

I missed my labs yesterday morning so this is what I was feeling. Just disappointed that I couldn’t get out of my slumber. Anyone who has known me all of my life know I have “ALWAYS” had this struggle. I worked really hard to break this lifetime battle with my family. We have managed to have some what of a routine. But it has been 11 years of my health obstacles. That’s pretty much all of my kid’s lives. I felt like we have gone back and forth with our efforts.

Last week I started to get challenged physically. My red blood cells dropped significantly and  I was just decreased my procrit injection dose from 3 x’s a week to once a week. This is an injection medication that helps stimulate red blood cells. I honestly am so tired of needles and dread each poke (Even though they are tiny needles). This balance of maintaining enough red blood cells has been a struggle through out the years dealing with kidney disease. Everything seemed to be stabilizing but was challenge with some “girlee” issues which  messed with my red blood cells (Sorry male readers). I’ve had several blood transfusions and every time builds antibodies which is not good for my kidney transplant. I had such strong days that I guess that happy balance of yucky days had to come my way.

This has been my current challenge and has made writing difficult. I started to writing yesterday but I hate to just shoot out post. Which I started to do because I wanted to meet my postaday challenge but I know the quality of writing is not so great. I thank all my subscribers for baring with me as I often change with corrections after the fact. Each day I long to write. This is the time I sit and take time for myself. I enjoy every word that comes to mind and I don’t ever want it to become a task. It’s been such jam-packed days that it has challenged the time I make. Especially when I’m sleeping in. That fret and rushing is so terrible. I really don’t want to do this with my writing. I changed my website a bit since I’m advertising with the upcoming fundraising events. I’m hoping to merge this blog and the website domain that I already have soon. I’m learning so much about becoming a daily blogger. As I mentioned this is really the first time I tapped into the blogging community. I’m inspired by all the blogs I’m finding and now following. I make my visits via cell phone between my trips to the hospital and my kid’s practices.

I don’t think I mentioned my youngest made it to his Little League “All Star” team (pretty huge deal for us). He’s had practice everyday along with my oldest football conditioning camp. I will say we have had some productive days and have taken care of so much. Plus we are still fundraising! So I can’t be too hard with myself how these days have been going lately. Most of what I’m feeling is  physical and leads to me becoming emotional. Just writing this makes me realize that it’s just the circle of life (As my friend Zully mentioned in her last post).

It’s so important that I have this outlet and I’m thankful for this creative expression. I was able to pick myself up today and do my labs. I couldn’t make it to the capital as I planned for the senate education hearing on bill AB 1967 for organ donation education. But with my red blood cells acting up I needed a timely lab result. They actually weren’t even sure if it was going to be presented so we had no obligation to attend. However, I did get updates and it was presented so hoping it passes. It would be great to have proper education of what organ donation is because there is just so much myths that are untrue. Media I tell you.. I need to update my Donate Life links too and provide much more information on organ donation (I did have once upon a website).  If there is ever a question please don’t hesitate to ask. I often post latest news on my facebook page.

As I often mention in my writing, all I can do is take it day by day. Tomorrow always brings new promise. Dreams will be realized!

Here’s a few photos of the activities in the past week, enjoy!

4 thoughts on “Time to Wake Up

  1. You are beautiful inside and out. Your inner beauty flows out into your writing and is truly inspiring.


    1. Thank you Kristen for your compliment. Likewise! You are so inspiring and I’m captivated by the power in your words. I see healing taking place and I’m thankful for your courage. Your beautiful spirit truly is a reflection in all that you share!


    1. Thank you for your comment and passing by! You have amazing photography!


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